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The Voice Of Reason

be the reason for the conversation

Our minds are wired to conserve energy.

That's why we often hear that negative inner voice saying things like, "I'm ugly," "I'm stupid," "I'm fat," or "I can't do it." These derogatory thoughts are common to all of us, stemming from the amygdala, which tries to protect us from attempting new and unfamiliar things.

In my coaching sessions with Janelle Brown, the star of "Sister Wives," we've been working on a paradigm shift—distinguishing facts from fiction in our self-talk. If I repeatedly tell myself,

"I am tired,"
"I'm overwhelmed,"
"I can't write,"
"I can't do this,"

I have to ask myself: Are these facts? Discerning between facts and the stories we tell ourselves is crucial.

Lessons from Janelle: The stories we tell ourselves are incredibly powerful.

For example, I often say that I don't have enough time. This story surfaces whenever I want to learn a new skill or tackle something unfamiliar, requiring significant investment in practice and learning. I tell myself, "I'm too tired," "I don't have the time," or "I don't have the money." These are common narratives, even among those who have the resources but feel too busy with their business, kids, or other commitments.

During our sessions, Janelle helps me recognize that these are just stories, not truths. Developing a new skill indeed takes a lot of energy and time, but the barriers we perceive are often self-imposed. Acknowledging this is the first step towards change.

In the next episode, we'll delve deeper into the stories we tell ourselves and how coaching with Janelle Brown can help rewrite those narratives. For those who haven't watched "Sister Wives," Janelle is a compassionate and insightful coach. I was initially nervous to meet her, but she quickly put me at ease, making our sessions productive and transformative.

If you find value in our discussions, please like this blog, share it with anyone who might benefit from coaching, and remember that there's no shame in asking for help—whether from a coach, therapist, pastor, mentor, or friend. We can't do life alone, so let's get obsessed with seeking the support we need.

Stay tuned as we share more intimate details of our coaching journey with Janelle Brown. Visit to learn more about her coaching services and embark on your journey of self-discovery and growth.

Listen To The Podcast NOW!
The Obsessed Podcast

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Girlfriends Are Everything

In today's fast-paced, digitally-driven world, we often skim our relationships' surface. Quick texts and social media interactions can create the illusion of connection, but they rarely provide the depth and authenticity we crave. Real conversations, those that delve into our true thoughts and feelings, are more crucial than ever. They are the lifeblood of meaningful connections, fostering understanding and empathy between individuals.

The Power of Authentic Dialogue

Real conversations go beyond small talk and superficial exchanges. They involve genuine listening, openness, and vulnerability. When we engage in such dialogue, we allow ourselves to be truly seen and heard, creating a bond that transcends the ordinary. These interactions help us understand each other's experiences, perspectives, and emotions on a deeper level, promoting empathy and compassion.

Authentic conversations are particularly transformative within the context of female friendships. These bonds are unique and powerful, offering a sanctuary of support and understanding. When women come together and share their truths, they create a space where they can be their authentic selves, free from judgment. These friendships become a source of immense strength and inspiration, empowering women to navigate life's challenges and celebrate its joys.

The Strength of Female Friendships

True female friendships are built on a foundation of trust, respect, and mutual support. They are a lifeline in times of need and a source of joy in moments of celebration. These relationships allow women to challenge each other to grow, offer encouragement in the face of adversity, and cheer each other on in their victories. In a world that often pits women against each other, nurturing these bonds is an act of rebellion and empowerment.

The impact of strong female friendships extends beyond the individuals involved. When women support and uplift each other, they create a ripple effect that can transform communities and society as a whole. By fostering environments where women feel valued and empowered, we pave the way for greater equality and understanding.

Letting Go of the Need to Prove Yourself

In a society that constantly measures worth by achievements and external validation, many of us fall into the trap of feeling the need to prove ourselves. This relentless pursuit can be exhausting and detrimental to our mental and emotional well-being. However, it is possible to break free from this cycle and embrace a more fulfilling and authentic life.

Recognizing Your Inherent Worth

The first step in letting go of the need to prove yourself is recognizing your inherent worth. Understand that your value is not dependent on what you accomplish or how others perceive you. Your worth is intrinsic and unchanging, rooted in your very being. Embracing this truth can be liberating, freeing you from the constant pressure to seek validation.

Practicing Self-Compassion

Self-compassion is a powerful tool in the journey towards self-acceptance. Treat yourself with the same kindness and understanding that you would offer a close friend. Acknowledge that making mistakes and experiencing setbacks are natural parts of life. These experiences do not diminish your worth but provide opportunities for growth and learning.

Setting Healthy Boundaries

Protecting your time and energy is essential for maintaining your well-being. Set healthy boundaries by saying no to activities or commitments that drain you or are motivated solely by a desire to impress others. Focus on what genuinely matters to you and aligns with your values and passions. By prioritizing your needs, you create space for self-discovery and fulfillment.

Surrounding Yourself with Supportive People

The company you keep can significantly influence your sense of self-worth. Surround yourself with supportive and affirming people who appreciate you for who you are, not just what you do. Positive relationships reinforce your intrinsic value and reduce the pressure to constantly prove yourself.

Engaging in Fulfilling Activities

Pursue activities that bring you joy and fulfillment, independent of others' opinions. Whether it's a hobby, a creative project, or simply spending time in nature, engaging in what you love can boost your confidence and satisfaction. These experiences remind you of your passions and unique strengths, helping you find contentment within yourself.

Challenging Negative Self-Talk

Negative self-talk can perpetuate feelings of inadequacy and the need to prove yourself. When you catch yourself in a cycle of self-doubt, challenge and reframe these thoughts. Remind yourself of your inherent worth and past achievements. Affirmations and mindfulness practices can also help you stay grounded and centered.


Embracing real conversations and cultivating powerful female friendships can enrich our lives in immeasurable ways. These connections provide a source of strength, support, and inspiration, empowering us to be our authentic selves. Simultaneously, letting go of the need to prove ourselves allows us to live more fulfilling and authentic lives. By recognizing our inherent worth, practicing self-compassion, setting healthy boundaries, surrounding ourselves with supportive people, engaging in fulfilling activities, and challenging negative self-talk, we can break free from the pressure to seek external validation and find true contentment within ourselves.


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Have you ever wondered how to take your business to the next level? Do you feel like you are doing the same thing every day and receiving the same ROI every day? It is time to shake up your entrepreneurial routine and do things bigger and bolder. It is time to get on stage.


20%–22% of small businesses fail within the first year

The failure rate for entrepreneurs has discouraged people for years, but this myth-busting stat from BLS data is one you can trust. On average, 30% of businesses will have failed by the end of their second year, and half will have closed their doors by the end of the fifth year. After a decade, only about a third of businesses will remain.

How can you stand out as an expert in your industry?

The simple answer is that you need to get in front of other people’s audiences and leverage yourself as an expert in your field.


Pitching yourself and your business on stages can be a powerful way to build your brand and attract opportunities. Here are some expert tips to help you effectively get yourself on stage and deliver compelling pitches:

  1. Identify Relevant Stages: Research events, conferences, seminars, and workshops related to your industry or niche. Look for opportunities where your target audience congregates or where industry influencers gather.

  2. Craft an Engaging Pitch: Develop a concise and captivating pitch that clearly communicates who you are, what your business does, and why your audience should care. Highlight your unique selling points and the value you offer.

  3. Tailor Your Pitch to Each Stage: Customize your pitch to fit the specific audience and theme of each event. Show organizers that you understand their audience and how your presentation aligns with their goals.

  4. Build Credibility: Establish yourself as an authority in your field by sharing valuable insights, case studies, success stories, and statistics during your pitch. Demonstrate your expertise and credibility to gain the trust of your audience.

  5. Practice, Practice, Practice: Rehearse your pitch until it flows naturally and confidently. Practice in front of a mirror, with friends or colleagues, or record yourself to identify areas for improvement.

  6. Start Small: Begin by speaking at local meetups, workshops, or small conferences to gain experience and build your confidence. As you refine your speaking skills and grow your reputation, you can aim for larger stages.

  7. Network with Organizers: Connect with event organizers through social media, industry associations, or networking events. Build relationships with them and express your interest in speaking at their events. Offer to provide value to their audience.

  8. Utilize Your Network: Leverage your existing network to get introductions or recommendations to event organizers. Reach out to mentors, colleagues, or industry contacts who may have connections in the event planning community.

  9. Create Compelling Content: Produce high-quality content through blogs, videos, podcasts, or social media that showcase your expertise and thought leadership. Event organizers often look for speakers who have a strong online presence and can attract attendees.

  10. Follow-Up: After delivering your pitch, follow up with event organizers and attendees to thank them for the opportunity and gather feedback. Maintain relationships with organizers for potential future speaking engagements.

  11. Be Persistent but Respectful: If you don’t get selected for a particular event, don’t be discouraged. Keep refining your pitch and applying to relevant opportunities. Be persistent in pursuing speaking opportunities while respecting the decisions of event organizers.


Landing a speaking gig is a surefire way to start monetizing your brand. Here are our favorite tips to launch your speaking career. We put a lot of energy into our brands and what we know to be true is when you speak on stage, you have the power to leverage your expertise, monetize your business, and grow exponentially. Public speaking gives you access to prove your viability and interact with stakeholders. While this seems like a no-brainer, it can be terrifying for a lot of creative entrepreneurs. Here is where you start⬇️

  1. Toastmasters- Toastmasters International is a nonprofit educational organization that builds confidence and teaches public speaking skills through a worldwide network of clubs that meet online and in person. This is a great place to receive feedback in realtime.

  2. Speaker One Sheet- A speaker one sheet, otherwise known as a “speaker sheet” or “one-pager,” is a one-page document (one or two-sided) explaining who you are, what you speak about, and why the event planner reading it should hire you. In other words, your one sheet is a brief resume of your speaking experience.

  3. Start talking everywhere for free- i.e. Library, schools, Chamber of Commerce Events. The more you speak in front of audiences the more confidence you will gain, as well as an audience hungry for your knowledge.

  4. Sign up for eSpeakers Bureau (or a qualified speakers bureau)- Speakers bureaus connect qualified speakers with event planners. Create a powerful profile and connect with potential speaking gigs.

  5. Look for Speaker Calls — Research speaker calls online. Many conferences post a speaker call (request for speakers) on their websites. Look for conferences in your niche and start pitching them.

You Got This- Jules

Let me know your favorite tip or trick to elevate your business. Email me directly at

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